07/14/2010
It's so hard when you fall in love, hard to make yourself fall right
out of it. It is like a sweet abyss that captures and swallows you up
leaving no room or energy to fight to move back toward the light. It's
like making a plate of food then saying that you will not eat it, as
the aroma plays tug of war with your noatrials. I am a believer of
making decsions and standing strong in your convictions, that has just
always been my moto...and then, and then I read a quote... that might
have had an impact on that notion all together and could have possibly
altered the way i think for years to come, until i read another
quote.... "stand strong in your decisions but yield flexible in your
approach".
Without hammering a fixed nail to far into it's housing, I plead that
this saying was very thought intensive and emotionally provoking.
After having to make so many decisions over the years I wondered to
myself..so that's what I needed to hear all along... huh?
In the past i just made a choice, stuck with it and called it a
day...now I think I'll change. I'll change my mind about how I feel
from day to day and grow closer and closer to the right thing for me.
It is important to note that what may be important and right to me may
not always and equivicolly be the right decision for the rest.
It must feel right' spark no feeling of unrest or heartache. I am
battling love because for the first time I think it's the right thing
for me. I want to know if this is real, or just a facet of my
imagination, I want to know if it's worth the silent tears that skate
down my checks and on to the satain pilliow cases I planned for us to
share I want to know if I let go...will you let go too.
...becase I am so in love with the thought but the thought just isn't
enough.
Cindy Ezeuka
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